Address snobbery. It happens everywhere, but somehow in New York, where you live seems to really matter to prospective dates.
You see, telling a die-hard Manhattan dwelling guy that you live somewhere in deepest darkest Queens, Brooklyn, New Jersey or, woe betides you, Upstate, will almost certainly mean he never calls. A similar attitude definitely exists in London, but the reasons are different.
Reason A): Travel
NYC: He can’t be bothered to ever schlep all the way to your place and doesn’t want you staying over all the time because you can’t get home
London: He has to be geographically aware because there is a high likelihood that due to the incomprehensible chaos that is public transport in London and the sheer size of the city, he actually might not be able to ever see you
Reason B) Money
NYC: He is concerned that you live there because you earn a pittance and will therefore expect him to subsidise any and all dating activities
London: This is probably the same as NY reason B. Let’s be honest!
Reason C) Class
NYC: He is a downright snob
London: He is a downright snob, but is this way due to centuries of proper breeding. The class system in good ole Blighty is in place because we have history, not solely because one person got lucky and landed a high paid job and the other didn’t
Reason D) Fear
NYC: He is genuinely terrified of ever leaving Manhattan or associating with anyone who does
London: He is genuinely terrified of leaving areas of London he feels comfortable in for fear of never being able to return due to reason A).
Sophie, a hardened NYC dater who is perfectly accustomed to, and even accepting of, the 'multiple dates at once' theory (see earlier blog entries for more on this), sees merits in the system.
“It works both ways,” she tells me, “I only date people with specific zip codes.”
So, once you’ve got your head around whether to say your high 90’s street address is in the “Upper Eastside” or “Spanish Harlem” neighbourhood depending on your audience, you’re all set. Just be aware if you are a Sophie and after a particular type of guy, because more than likely, he’s ‘adapting’ his address too…